Tuesday, February 19, 2008

How I Wish I Got Suspended by LSU

Ryan Perrilloux got suspended by LSU for some odd reasons that we don't know yet...but that doesn't stop us from speculating. Shit from coke and gambling has been thrown around, but nothing has been offically discussed as of yet. Anyways, in OJ's vein, if I was going to be suspended, this is how it'd happen:

So I go into this casino right, rollin' off my ass on this fine ass blow that I picked up from the Cuban dude who lives in my buddy's apartment complex, with a fat gangsta roll in my pocket. Brilliantly, I'm wearing team issued sweats and stink of women and chronic and am speaking in the 3rd person just so people know who I am...a ridiculously talented, yet mentally retarded backup QB at a football factory.

Next thing I know, I'm down $20,000 to this fat hick who keeps hitting on 16. So I punch him in his nuts, start yelling and firing my gun into the air. I wake up tasered and strapped to a gurney in a padded room. Fun stuff.

I wish I played college football.

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