Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Let's start it off with some good ol' Michigan hatin'. I love the Dead Schembechlers. Why? Because they hate Michigan. Oh, why not, one more for good measure...
Wow, that's nice. Real nice. Good fuckin' music. Nothing beats pounding vahg while listening to a song that says, "Chad Henne is a dick, a motherfucking dick, a fucked up, sucked up whiny prick, he can't catch a chick, when he fucks, he comes to quick because Chad Henne is a motherfucking dick."
Now let's get down to the meat...THE BROWNS SCHEDULE!!!!!! What a rovery surprise during draft month, 3 Monday Night Football games (which could go to two if the Eagles game gets moved to Thanksgiving night), 1 Sunday Night Football game, a Thursday night NFL Network game and a slew of national spotlight games. The world will see what Brown and Orange rape looks like, especially against those asshole Stillers.
GAME 1: DALLAS COWBOYS
This will be a tough one, lets just be conservative and chalk it up as a loss.
GAME 2: PITTSBURGH STEELERS
This will be a win, I have no doubt about it.
GAME 3: at BALTIMORE RAVENS
I want to be conservative and not get crazy...I'm gonna say this is a loss as well. Don't worry lil' Brownies...
GAME 4: at CINCINNATI BENGALS
This will be a win...Think Ocho will still be there? I don't...sinking ship.
GAME 5: NEW YORK GIANTS
This too will be a win, just a gut feeling. Still don't think Eli is THERE yet, but it should be a great game. Can't wait to watch Joe Thomas and the Big Turds go up against MICHAEL STRAHAN, HOW BOUT THEM COWBOYS?!?!?!
GAME 6: at WASHINGTON REDSKINS
Win. Washington sucks.
GAME 7: at JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS
Loss. It'll be a great test for our new D-line, but you can't win em all.
GAME 8: BALTIMORE RAVENS
GAME 9: DENVER BRONCOS
Hmm...short week because it's a Thursday game, still think this is a win, Denver's D-line is just overmatched by our O-line, simple as that.
GAME 10: at BUFFALO BILLS
Buffalo sucks, still won't hear anything that will convince me otherwise. Trent Edwards is your future? Enjoy Toronto.
GAME 11: HOUSTON TEXANS
Win. Don't like Houston yet, plus Schaub will probably be injured at this point, they still don't have a running game, no matter who they draft, just see them as a team on the rise, but not there yet.
GAME 12: INDIANAPOLIS COLTS
Remember Week 17 from last year? Yea, me too.
GAME 13: at TENNESSEE TITANS
I don't like the Titans at all. They haven't drafted well and look like a team that's going to be in the top 10 for the next few years just because they have NO depth at any position other than RB.
GAME 14: at PHILADELPHIA EAGLES
Depends if this is a Thursday game or not...if so, it'll be a little big tougher, well...let's just stay conservative and call this a loss as well.
GAME 15: CINCINNATI BENGALS
This will be a win because it should be shitty weather. Running on the Bengals? Easy as gettin' the clap in New Orleans. Not that I know or anything. Nope. Moving on...
GAME 16: at PITTSBURGH STEELERS
Let's call this a loss too, JUST TO STAY CONSERVATIVE. Don't like it either, but I don't want to look like a typical homer.
So let's get a quick tally...11-5? Should be good enough to win the AFC North, all things considered. Won't be too easy, but I'd say it's do-able, you?
I'm fuckin' excited, can't wait till the fall.
Posted by Unknown at 8:06 PM